I want a lover just like me!
Once you pass the first impression test, you're in the second phase of your relationship.
At this time, your lover begins to make various evaluations of you to judge whether you can be a qualified lover.
Subconsciously, he or she says, "I want a lover who is exactly like me. Well, at least basically the same. "
If life - or a date - requires compatibility, then having common ground between men and women is a must.
The human mind is a delicate instrument, always keenly seeking out its own kind, those whose worldviews and values are more or less similar to ours.
Similarity makes us feel at ease because it gives us an assurance that we made the right choices in our previous lives.
We like to find people who have similar interests so that we can share them and have fun together.
Similarity is indeed a good launchpad for getting intimacy off the ground. But when two people are too similar, boredom is inevitable.
Besides, we also need someone to make up for our shortcomings. If neither person is good at math, who's going to help me organize my checkbook? If they're both sloppy, who's going to pick up my dirty socks?
So when looking for a long-term life partner, we're looking for qualities that complement us, but not just any complementary qualities - we need qualities that are interesting or make our lives more complete.
So we look for partners who are both similar and complementary to us.
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